When I first got into Kpop in 2020 I was mind blown by all of it. How big and fun and colorful it was. How different it was, everything just made it all so exciting. And it all came in a time where I needed it most, in the midst of COVID.
I started to center my entire personality around kpop and BTS. It made me happy, and I finally had a hobby I could fully get into and always be entertained.
Now in the year 2022, even though I haven’t been in the game nearly as long as some stans, I’ve started to see all the racism, bullying, and just the pure toxicity of being a kpop fan.
No matter how much you try and avoid it all, you still see the drama. The racism within the fandoms and the industry is starting to get uncomfortable as a black fan. Especially knowing kpop, k-rb, k hip-hop is 100% based off of black culture. But rarely does the black community gets their credit.
It’s the hectic way when merch drops and you literally have to enter a blood bath and will most likely never get it. It’s the constant fomo, feeling like you have to keep up with all your groups and whatever they’re doing. Especially during comeback season, it’s super stressful.
What I once found as a escape from the real world is starting to get just as stressful. And a hobby should never be like that.
I find myself not caring when they go live, I’m not caring as much about new singles and when merch drops I roll my eyes and keep it moving.
I think I’ll be taking a step back and just become a casual fan for a while. Real life is starting to speed up and I can’t keep up if I’m dumping my money and time into Kpop.
Now I’ll still be blogging about my faves but I’m not gonna be a super Stan, if that makes sense. I love what BTS and kpop has done for me. It pushed me out of my comfort zone and I’ve made so many awesome memories from it.
I’ll also still be going to concerts when I can. Just won’t stress about going to every single date.
If you would have told me a year ago I’d be here, I would laugh in your face. But people grow and things change. My life is changing alot and I have to be able to keep up.
Things will definitely STILL be all things kpop here. As there will always be something to write about. But I’ll also be blogging about some of my other interests, because I am interested in a lot of different things.
Hopefully you stick around and thank you for sticking around this long, through my many eras. I’m finally coming into my own and I hope it’s reflecting through my writing.
Until next time friends…..